Before you try again I recommend that you take some creative writing courses. Xxx video I give this attempt a 1 out of 10.«12» Remember when you are writing in the future that you are painting a picture with words in your readers mind. Your “Choppy” way of writing with short incomplete sentences is almost impossible for the reader to follow a coherent story line or thought process. Before you try again I recommend that you take some creative writing courses. Dude is MEXICANFbaileyReport 2010-06-16 23:42:35Great story keep it goingThe EditorReport 2010-06-16 19:01:33Sorry, but I couldn’t finish reading this “Supposed” story, it was just to difficult to read and understand. You obviously have a budding imagination but your writing skills leave much to be desired. Remember when you are writing in the future that you are painting a picture with words in your readers mind.
